


Letter to Jim

by Iamama23



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-16 17:31:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9282506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iamama23/pseuds/Iamama23
Summary: Based off a rp: Krem and Jim were in a relationship. They adopted a little girl, Fayette, whose family had been murdered by blood mages. Jim was murdered on their wedding day. This letter is written a year after the massacre. Thank you to XxWhiteWolfxX for her use of her Lyn Hawke.





	

My darling Jim, 

I had a dream last night that left me feeling a peace I haven't felt in a long time. I go to sleep at night and I'm plagued with nightmares, or rather A nightmare. It's always the same one, always on repeat. We had just said our vows, leaving our loved ones with tears in their eyes. And then the fucking Venatori attack and my beloved falls. And no matter how many times I try to do something different, I can never save you. Every night I watch you die, and every morning I wake up feeling my heart shattering all over again. 

But last night was different. Last night I dreamt of you, but not of your death. It was a dream of the two of us back at our spot. You know where we had our first real date, where we first made love. I've gone back there once, but it didn't feel the same. It just felt...dull and lifeless. Not the beautiful spot I remembered it to be.

I digress, my love, so back to my dream. I was back on our picnic blanket, and you were there. We talked and laughed, and made love. It was beautiful, and special, and not even a little bit sad. It was as though you hadn't left me, as though we were still together. The dream doesn't end there. Time fast forwarded to another wedding. Our sweet baby girl had chosen a groom, and had asked her fathers to walk her down the aisle. His face I couldn't see, he was just a blur. No doubt the day she finally does wed, he will be a blur that day as well. My attention was solely on Fayette, dressed in a gorgeous white dress trimmed in shades of blue. Her hair was piled high on her head, pinned up by her aunt Lyn. But it was the dress that drew all of the attention. Why? Because you had made it, my darling Jim. It had taken you over a year to make it perfect, a task you had started the minute Faye announced her engagement. No matter how many times she told you it was fine, you would argue that 'fine' wasn't good enough for your little girl. It made me smile in the dream, as it makes me smile now. 

Unlike the dark day of our wedding, Fayette and her groom were united together without a hitch. What was like our wedding, there wasn't a dry eye in the crowd. I couldn't tell you what vows were said, but no doubt our daughter took a page out of your book and wrote them the same day she met the man of her dreams. I sometimes wonder how you just happened to have vows ready to say that day. The wedding was a surprise, yet I think you were more prepared than I was. I had agonized over how to express to you everything that I was feeling. Except every draft felt...inadequate. Like I was letting you down. I've never been good with expressing myself, always feeling as though *I* wasn't good enough. When the Chief made me a part of the Chargers, for the first time I felt like I finally belonged. And then I met you. You turned my world upside down and I tried to resist you. Maker did I try. But He wouldn't let me, YOU wouldn't let me.

So, I dreamed of what our life could have been, what it should have been. When I opened my eyes this morning, for the first time I wasn't sad. I probably should have been, waking from something that could never be. But I think it finally gave me the closure I had been seeking. I'm still going to miss you, I know that. But maybe I won't have as many nightmares anymore. Maybe my dreams will be plagued with memories instead. I know there was nothing I could do to save you that day, so now it's time for me to move past and carry on for our daughter. No one will ever replace you in my heart or hers, that I can guarantee. Every day for the past year I've told her stories; stories about you, about me, about us. The ones that involve you are her favorite. I'll tell you a secret my love, they're my favorite too. I'm going to end this now, because I fear if I don't I might never.

Love always,   
Krem

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read my first posted fan fic. Leave me kudos and comments please.


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